Holy Evil Trainer Batman!

So I've complained for years since moving here that there wasn't a decent gym in town. Where I lived before there was a great 24/7 gym and it had childcare and nightly classes, etc. I used to go with a co-worker on nearly a daily basis and I got into really good shape! I haven't felt that good in forever. And I miss it!

Before having my 2nd child, I joined Curves. It was OK. I really felt out of place. And that was strange considering it is totally geared to women. I think the main problem is that I felt like the youngest member and the workout was monotonous to say the least. For any of you who have never been, you basically workout in a circle on different machines....go around the circle 3 times and your done. It's cool for awhile....but gets old! At least for me it did.....

Last week I saw some pamphlets that were left in our pizza shop up here where we live. Turns out a new gym was opening up in the shopping plaza near by. Cool! So I decided to go check it out the following weekend.

It's a cool gym. Not real big, but it has all the equipment I am familiar with. The membership price wasn't bad and so what the hey, I joined. Turns out they don't have room now for classes, but they are looking to rent the space next door with plans to do something like have classes in the future. Sounds great!

I went in the next day for my consultation with a trainer. This was just a basic get your weight, BMI, blood pressure, etc. Then he walked me through the gym showing me how all the stuff worked. I also decided to get a few sessions with him in hopes he could help whip my rear into a shape other than ROUND! LOL

Yesterday was session one. I arrived and he greeted me holding a clipboard and two sheets of yellow legal paper where he had mapped out our hour together......an hour.....what did I just get myself into LOL. I started with 10 minutes on the elliptical machine AKA Satan incarnate. I guess it's not quite as bad as the dreaded StairMaster, but it's darn close!

I did my 10 minutes, as soon as I stepped off this machine my legs were JELLY. Holy crap! Then I follow my trainer to the back of the gym.....he proceeds to make me do squats, lunges, modified push ups on the shoulder press bar, modified pull ups on that bar (me sitting looking like an arse not being able to pull myself up from the floor...talk about shameful LOL)....I am really dying at this point. And we are BARELY at the 1/2 way point!! Then he whisks me to the free weight section and has me doing some other upper body exercise with *blush* 2lb weights. Next we went to the other side of the gym and he has me do those reverse sit ups....you know where you face downward, wedging your legs on some pads and bend down then come back up? Oy.

At this point my face is bright red LOL I then remind him that I have children at home to care for, including a 20+ pound infant I will need to carry the next day! He has no mercy.....next stop the mats. He has me working my core. Sitting with my knees up, arms out in front of me holding what might as well be a 100 pound medicine ball. Side, middle, side.....over and over. I really just want to die. After that, I'm on the floor laying on my side struggling to lift my fat arse and hip off the floor only using my side muscles.....side muscles, obliques? WTH are you KIDDING me? This my friends was a sad SAD sight.

Oh but it gets better!

3 minutes of "general fitness".....this was the most embarrassing display of physical activity in my ENTIRE life folks. If I wasn't in so much pain at this point I would have probably crawled under a treadmill. I had to do 15 jumping jacks....my legs felt like they were going to buckle at any moment. Not to mention my failure to wear.....or even OWN for that matter.....a sports bra. OH MY GOODNESS. Talk about a sight.....after the jumping jacks I had to SKIP across the gym. You see what I said? SKIP! You HAVE to be joking. Again, a VERY sad sight. Then I had to do these things that I have seen football players do during warm ups at high school games on occasion. You get down like you are going to do push ups, then you jump your feet up under yourself, then jump them back into the push up position. This was ridiculous. There are NO words I can use to accurately describe the way I might have looked at this point. After this there was another series of jogging and more lunges....then I got to "cool down" on the treadmill for 10 minutes. Let me tell you, I was NEVER so happy to see a treadmill in my LIFE.

When I got home and walked in the door, my husbands face was priceless. That is how BAD I looked. All I could do was tell him this trainer was worth every penny and then head up to my beloved jacuzzi tub for a soak. I did nothing the rest of the day or night LOL

Today I am one sore cookie. I barely trust myself to carry my baby up or down the stairs my legs hurt so bad. My arms are pretty sore too. Lord help me because I have 7 more sessions with this guy LOL

So I'm going to stick it out. As bad as I hurt today, I know that it will pay off in the long run. I really need to get fit. Not just for me and my own well being, but for my kids sake.

Now I'm off for another dose of Advil so I can make lunch for my 3 year old LOL